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I'm Alexander and I'm the happiest owner of GQ Nissan Safari in the whole Central Asia
When an electrician wires up rear lights on his Patrol.
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Pisser Tony!
Speaking of electricity, we nearly just had deep fried tourist dim sum falling outa the sky onto our factory!
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Clunk (22nd August 2018), mudnut (17th August 2018), pearcey (17th August 2018), PeeBee (17th August 2018), Rossco (17th August 2018), rusty_nail (17th August 2018), the evil twin (17th August 2018), TPC (17th August 2018)
Bobs Epic Balloon Flights... highly recommended for all thrill seekers.
Our Motto "One Flash and your Ash"
After every flight join in the onsite Complimentary BBQ provided and enjoy a chat with the local emergency services members and Ambos
Disclaimer, Unfortunately due to Gov't Regs we are prohibited from operating during high fire danger periods
Last edited by the evil twin; 17th August 2018 at 11:21 AM.
Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
Scary stuff the valley!
With two grass multi strip airports within 5km of each other, student pilots galore, sightseeing, skydiving and dozens of balloons, hectic skies up there!!
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MB (17th August 2018)
Crikey Hodge, lucky bugger!!
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An oldie that has probably been on here before.
Ecownomics
SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.
BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
RESERVE BANK OF AUSTRALIA (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.
SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
A GREEK CORPORATION
You have two cows. You borrow lots of euros to build barns, milking sheds, hay stores, feed sheds, dairies, cold stores, abattoir, cheese unit and packing sheds. You still only have two cows.
A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you
want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market it worldwide.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the **** out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least you are now a Democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive...
4bye4 (3rd October 2018), Avo (20th August 2018), Clunk (22nd August 2018), gaddy (11th September 2018), GQtdauto (1st September 2018), MB (20th August 2018), PeeBee (19th August 2018), Plasnart (18th August 2018), Rossco (18th August 2018), rusty_nail (14th September 2018), the evil twin (19th August 2018), Touses (19th August 2018), Wine_maker (20th August 2018)
WARNING...Blokes!
Only ever press the big round button.....curiosity soaks thy sack :-(
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