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The chilean miners finally got rescued , one night Pepe was in bed with wife about to get intimate and says to wife" can we turn off the lights ," "sure thing anything you want darling " then he says "do you mind turning around ", "sure anything you want "."one more thing darling ,can i call you Pedro"..
A man gets pulled over by the police & when approaching the man the officer seen a VB label stuck to his forehead, with that the officer asks "you been drinking sir" the bloke turns to the copper & says nar mate im on the patches.....
I was walking along the street one day when I saw this bloke with a fishing rod and line, constantly casting it from the sidewalk out to the white line in the middle of the road and then reeling it back in again. I stopped to watch, figuring the bloke was a bit soft in the head, and after a while, I couldn't resist any longer and walked over to him and said "how ya goin old mate, how many you caught?" ... he turned around slowly with a smile on his face and said "your the eighth one today" ...
Not the best one ever, but a good clean one for the kiddies - figure I can't post the blue ones, and apart from this one, and the "why do cows wear bells" joke, I don't know any clean ones ...
oh, by the way, they wear bells because their horns don't work (badda bing).
I recently came back from a tour of duty in Afghanistan.
Having not seen my wife for several months,
I was looking forward to a night of hot passionate sex.
Unfortunately she came out of the shower
with a towel wrapped round her head -
so I shot her !
[QUOTE=Bigrig;17912]I was walking along the street one day when I saw this bloke with a fishing rod and line, constantly casting it from the sidewalk out to the white line in the middle of the road and then reeling it back in again. I stopped to watch, figuring the bloke was a bit soft in the head, and after a while, I couldn't resist any longer and walked over to him and said "how ya goin old mate, how many you caught?" ... he turned around slowly with a smile on his face and said "your the eighth one today" ...
LOL................ Good one Big Fella................LOL
I like it a lot..........LOL
My turn.
A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does
His elbow hits her on the breast.
They are both quite startled.
The man turns to her and says, 'Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast,
I know you'll forgive me.'
She replies, 'If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221..'
Cheers Pete
Last edited by wildgu6; 17th November 2010 at 06:45 PM.