Quote Originally Posted by Plasnart View Post
If memory serves me right, Johnson had a shocking tour last time the Ashes were in England, but grew a massive handlebar for the next series in Oz and set about tearing the poms new ones, multiple times, to lead the Aussies to a 5-0 whitewash. That, right there, is scientific, peer-reviewed and undeniable proof of the majestic power of the lip lizard!

Boony, Border, Big Merv, Chapple, Marsh, Lillee. All legends, all would not be seen dead with a fluffy duck in hand or a diamond stud in both ears. Blokes we looked up to as kids and dreamt of being as rugged, mean and gritty as they were. The pure essence of tough and formidable.

Yes, my fellow Australians, it is time for a revolution! No player can be selected to play cricket for this country without a hairy upper lip. The bigger it is, the higher their pay and biggest mo gets captaincy!! With this action plan in place we are guaranteed to win the next 5-test series at least 7-0, maybe even more!
Dont think Smitty can grow facial hair yet lol