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1. Life of a gearbox (general duties including [not constant] towing) is about 250000Km - some models last longer, some less so.
2. Two lots of transmission oil to change - first lot in the gearbox itself and second lot in the transfer case.
The oil in the transfer case may be thicker (i.e. heavier) than the gearbox oil.
If your gear changes are difficult when the vehicle is cold, you might look at a lighter oil - e.g. grade 80 instead of 90