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Thread: The Joke Thread

  1. #71
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    Australian Medical Association researchers have found
    that patients needing blood transfusions may benefit
    from receiving chicken blood
    rather than human blood.
    It tends to make the men cocky and the women lay better....

  2. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by CoR View Post
    Australian Medical Association researchers have found
    that patients needing blood transfusions may benefit
    from receiving chicken blood
    rather than human blood.
    It tends to make the men cocky and the women lay better....
    Im shaking my head right now CoR but im laughing as im doing it....lolololololololol

  3. #73
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    hahaha.

    Oh this is not a competition lol

  4. #74
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    yeah it is mate, just a dry one (a bit like that last joke....lololol)

  5. #75
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    oh ok lol :P

  6. #76
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    Come on Cor I meant it in a good way....... I love these jokes, there simple & funny as (if I remember right? I started the thread with one....lol) so give us some more....PLEEEAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSE
    Last edited by patch697; 20th August 2010 at 12:00 AM.

  7. #77
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    ok.........................ok LOL

    BEST AUSSIE PICK UP LINE EVER:

    A Aussie walks into a pub and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman..
    He gives her a quick glance then casually looks at his watch for a moment.

    The woman notices this and asks, 'Is your date running late?'
    'No', he replies,'I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just testing it..'
    The intrigued woman says, 'a state-of-the-art watch?
    ''What's so special about it?'
    The Aussie explains, 'It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically.'
    The lady says, 'What's it telling you now?'

    Well, it says you're not wearing any panties.'
    The woman giggles and replies
    'Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!'

    The Aussie smiles, taps his watch and says,
    ' Bloody thing's an hour fast!'

  8. #78
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    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL....................See now that the stuff right there..........lololol Top marks.

    What a bloody shame Plassy & Rossco weren't here for that one.....lol

  9. #79
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    lmao. I will post more soon m8

  10. #80
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    A good postman.....


    One Monday morning the Postman is riding through the neighbourhood on his usual route, delivering the mail. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were still in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Derek, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles for the recycling bin.

    'Wow Derek, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night,' the Postman comments.

    Derek, in obvious pain, replies 'Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday morning. We had about 15 couples from around the neighborhood over for some weekend fun and it got a bit wild. We all got so drunk around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I.'

    The Postman thinks a moment and says, 'How do you play
    WHO AM I?'

    'Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us, with only our 'family jewels' showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is.'

    The Postman laughs and says, 'Sounds like fun, I'm sorry I missed it.'

    'Probably a good thing you did,' Derek responded. 'Your name came up 7 times.

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