Depression

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Originally Posted by Westy's Accessories

Well gents and ladies. Tis time I spoke up.

As some may have noticed I've pulled out from the Simpson trip and I'll try my best to explain my situation..

To put it simply, broke as a skunk.
But it's not a bad broke. I have a spending issue. Have always had money trouble. No matter what I'm doing I cant hold money, it burns holes in my pockets.

My last hobby I had to quite as my spending was uncontrollable. Credit cards maxed, mortgage sometimes got missed it got that bad.
So I sold it all. Not an Rc thing left.

Well I did well for 6 months. Things were looking good. And then I started the Patrol.
Well I've pretty much blown 3500 bucks from a redraw facility via a farking high 14% interest loan on Jack shoit.
It's still just a GQ..
And worst of all I've been hiding it all.
I'm not sure why I hid it. But the wife found out. She was pissed to say the least. As it was second time she nearly walked out..

So pretty much that's it.
I have contacted life line and our local support network for assistance with money issues.
On a side note no wonder why there are so many suicides this time of year. 3-4 week wait to see someone. Crazy.

Anyway. Yea. I won't be making the Simpson.
And now with this farking varicose vain issue that's another couple thou gone.

Once this patrol is finished I'll be going quite for a while. Westy's Accessories will probably be rested for a while, not that it's booming anyway..
And I'll be hopefully putting demons and veins to rest.

Anyway, everyone have a wonderful Christmas and New years.
Cheers

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Hey Kallen why not try to get the bank to renegotiate the loan mate, I managed to get my bank to drop the rate on mine by nearly 3% when I threatened to move banks! it may help you especially if you are on that sort of rate! it should only be around 7% maximum.

I was sitting up here late as it is, thinking how today I may be just having 2 minute noodles or the like while I work on the patrol today and being someone who looks for the good before the bad , it is a good day for me , especially still being above the grass …don’t get me wrong , I am not lonely , just alone today…It was a choice I made…I chose to work away sometimes for up to months at a time and lost sight of priorities .
Life is about loss but I think sometimes we as men create loss un-necessarily.
My point is Westy that it is always our choices we make as men that get us in the shit.....sometimes our partners are the butt of humour but our partners , wives , etc can be our best advisors most of the time because we can be like big kids with our needs , especially with our cars and as much as we may listen , we don’t really hear what is being said with the subtle comments or even not so subtle and we take them for granted quite alot…maybe why they at times refer to us men as dumb as dog shit…not intellectually but emotionally and not really hearing what they are saying. Marriage or relationship is a business in itself and requires negotiation and compromise and the women are better at this than us because they can be more realistic more than not …your wife obviously loves you , but it is rare that we get a third chance at it if we are wrong . We know when we are wrong because of that tight feeling in the stomach when we are doing it due to knowing the potential conscequences and you are not alone in this Westy , I am guilty of it and there wouldn’t be many blokes on here who were not guilty of taking their partners for granted in some way.
I don’t know anyone on here and I hope I haven’t overstepped my boundaries or to appear that I could tell you how it works but I am sorry to read about your situation and if you lived closer I would be happy to help you with labour and tools etc if it could ease the financial outlay with the car at all .
You have opened up to a lot of people and as much as it is a big thing to do , and to be respected , the hard bit will be to act on it and I believe you will able to do that yourself seeing as you had the nads to table what you did man.
Don’t see the need for you to go quiet on here…you seem to have good friends here and I think everyone would like to hope you are seeing the good before the bad , especially at this time of the year man .
All the best to you and your family with the problems and for xmas Westy

also sorry to hear about your loss Evil , 35 years of marraige is definately something i wish I could have achieved , if only I had , had the guts and the knowledge you and you wife must have had....good to see you are re-instating yourself back into some social parts of life...obviously a sad time of year for you so I hope you can do it the best way you can and look forward to reading more from you and Westy in the future...cheers

Good words from both Menace and Cuppa............. so much thought that is directed towards the ones that need it and comfort in the fact that others care enough to help make sense of it all..

Evil I will not pretend to understand how you have been feeling mate and I know the pain will never leave you but all I can say is you have had 35 years with a person you truly love and to rejoice in the time you did have together... so much more than many others have had.

My sincerest sympathies to you Evil and to your family. I think cuppa and menace sumed it up for words better than I can.

I too think cuppa and menace hit the nail On the head. I knew I was pushing boundaries.
I think in my head there were 2 points pushing me, 1 to just finish the bloody thing. There is only 1 thing worse than having a crap car, and that's no car..

And 2 I wanted to make it a nice ride.
Plan was the wife take the Patrol and I get a buz box.
Anyway plan has shot to shoit. It's still gq. I have to learn to be happy with what I have And not try keep up with the Joneses..

So yea, still in contact with the respective channels, I'm not suicidal or that but what I have just been threw sure is a wake up. Now I have to act..

And wild although I have not lost a partner yet I had to carry a very close mate lost to shark attach at 17 and my grandpa at 16, 10 year's tomorrow he passed away.
So if you need to chat mate throw us a pm.

Condolences ET, all I can offer is an ear should you ever need one mate. Personally I doubt I would be as strong as you should the tables be turned.
Stay strong mate, there is a lot of love and compassion in this forum. Use it,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Westy, man you've got balls!
To openly post your situation takes enormous courage.
Your wife is one heck of a gal, thats for sure! You've got my mobile if you need to chat dude, please feel free to use it,,,,,

Westy, sounds to me like your crap with money, to say the least.

Do you trust your partner enough to let her and only her handle the money. Dunno about over there, but people get in a real mess over here due to the ease of loans etc,etc. Our bank loan rates are usually a damned sight better than the loan companys. Go talk to the bank manager, be honest, he may be able to help you with lower interest rates and lower monthly repayments.

I got bit with it a long time ago mate and it is easy done. Nowadays, if I don`t have the spare cash, I don`t buy it, simple as that.

Is it easy? hell no, I really wanted that 4.2 shorty but didn`t have enough spare cash at the time. You can do it if your pig headed enough and stubborn enough and, importantly, your partner helps you along. She sounds like a bloody good girl mate, don`t lose her because you want new toys. What would hurt more, not having a few toys or losing her? I think I know the answer to that.

Sorry if I sound harsh, I really don`t mean to mate.

I am shocking with money. No if buts or maybes.
Wife is better, still a bit forgetful but since all bills are paid weekly by direct debit Its better.
As I mentioned in the other threads I needed to stop avoiding the situation.
Am I happy the wife found out? Not really. But I am sorta glad she did.

2014 is a new year.

You'll be right Kallen it wont take too long for you to turn things around.
Maybe a place like budget busters on tv can set you on the right path,
Chin up mate I have faith that you and your wife will put this behind you.
Get a day job and use your business for as extra income for family projects.
Anyway PM anytime its a whole new year soon