Around the campfire
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Around the campfire
with fresh damper
That's the best
beer iv tasted
to soak up
The left over
camp fire stories
That are scary
and beerly true
But still make
a good nightly
Trip all worthwhile
to the dunny
to drop a
very large toybota
in and flush
it down toilet
where it belomgs
but it clogs
like a giant
dirty dunny brush
with steel bristles
covered in excreta
that landcrabbers eat
along with sumpoil
and busted diffs
Out of Holdens
you mean fords
But I didn't
definately not nissans
and lada`s sump
oil to put
into prospective the
issues for tissues
Another update. Fantastic to see the quality is slowly lifting! lol
‘Beer anyone,” yelled ???????
“I’ll av arf,” shouted nowoolies to Andy, as he quickly chugs it down really fast their stinky armpits with their feet.
“Arrrr, that’s better – ‘n one fer me mate, Rossco, who works tirelessly to keep you lot well informed of this thread because no one else here drives a t t t – turbo intercooled scooters.
“Yer a clown in the circus touring the country, juggling tojo parts by their ears – big dumbo ears, with a looong wait for videos”.
“Ooooo, that hurts, but I like not just yours, but that one, with the big shiney thing on top, takes the cake and the beer back to mine for some fun at Growler’s Bar – where we all get totally p!$$ed and fall off our man bags on Doggy’s arm – that Doggy supplied and loves dearly his pink one. Onya mate –LMAO.
Can’t count either – and then the sheep took flight, jumped the moon, with the spoon of vile medicine of minced bunyips and spiders’ sweat mixed with bourbon. What a waste of spiders’ sweat, cause no one wants to drink that without sweat. And the bourbon, but will settle for nothing less for the bland gastronomical delight of something different – like a severe blockage – salami and vanilla flavoured icey cream, with 4 sardines.
But not everone likes sardines, so we should mix curry powder in with cane toads with three eyes and one long hot tube of chilli sauce, Amigo, for my tacos, not to mention Doggies man bag – the pink frilly one that matches his purple blue tutu and high heals sneakers with blue ankle straps that join his fishnet stockings and garter and his kaftan to his head with liquid na!l$ - redefining his outlook of all things great and small. Although he never became a vet, as he didn’t have the brains for that sort of sausage eating contest and skulling beer and occasional spirit, to make things that much simpler in the sloppy 4wd paradise park, tackling the mud with absolute glee – spraying all the cruisers in their path – then having a laugh at their sad, deeply bogged toys, which have no ballz – have manginas – az toymo drivers do lack in ballz and real 4 x 4s are NISSAN PATROLS – withouta doubt, that is given oh what a feeling.
Izza Nissan, see. Patrol the way to neverending enjoyment – mud…rocks…hills - and nothing to upset the applecart and make us feel all sober – which is bad for responsible alco’s - as they love the mud and having a beer or bourbon whiskey, whilst trying to kiss the woman belonging to their friend, onion ring, from HJ’s.
From ch!ne$e restraurant number 69 please wiv fly lice’
“Jeprey, bring prease number florty fwee?”
“No more orders - giving away Chinese - prefer a curry in a hurry with macka’s flurrie vindaloo indaloo”.
“Here comes Chucky”.
“Oh, that’s mucky”
“Wow, that’s lucky – not Kentucky friend and without the cane toads ontop, that make it like Bob’s applepie with lotsa cream – cane toad cream from squashed ones.
“You two sick”!
Fresh juicy runny glistening toad entrails- and loving it – the thought of as they slide over one’s tung, around the gums while taking it to their campsite on the barbeque. Chops n beer in a old keg BBQ, next to esky full of icey poles and lollies, bourbon and coke and funny smoke of the psychedelic dried marigold bush after reaching maturity from down south of the river – near our friends with their silly smiles and crazy hats and flowers in their very large and pretty dresses and huggin trees to stop the koalas from descending to attack possums and the drop bears that attack randomly when out bush on the unsuspecting city folk when looking for mushies in pine forrest with billy tea, made Billy silly and started to see magical colours and drop bears.
Bloomin pesky bears, falling from sky and denting their trippers’ heads. Must wear hardhats to be safe in the forrest with the lumberjacks choppin gold tops near camp grounds surrounded by bunyips, with no where to run and nowhere to hide because there are no forests on planet Mars – only aliens who eat bunyips with pasta on the side and big cane toads jumping around on the plate while I’m trying to tie shoelaces of spaggetti toasties dribbling down your left trouser leg and straight into Clunk’s left boot and out through the lace holes. The spaggetti ran, coz it stank – being sock contaminated with toe jam smeared all over his rancid boots.
But alas, no more, and they dissolved and….
“OMG. What’s that”?
“It’s a shopping trolley overfilled with delicious beer and bundy rum”.
MMMMM rum mmmmm didliy yum yum.
P!$$ed again and no more work, no more bundy. Dhuck sobbed profusely.
“Dhuck has water.”
“Great.”
“Let’s drown wooly’s suggestion.”
“Quick, go buy bourbon>”
“Prefer the beer or polish spirit over some of my bacon.”
Not what I would try at Easter. Is not that bad when you’re on your knees and looking up at the stars.
With hands out to his sides, he started flapping, and flew away – never to be kept in captivity for the rest of the night for being bad at being bad. Just like Tiom, who posts naughty but nice pics, which gets deleted – like my aliens, by mysterious means, or alien haters from nudist camps, carrying man bags, whilst skidding around the strawberry fields in pink tutus singing YMCa and Mancho, mancho man – with fluffy bits manbag hanging between skinny, very long, think skanky twig legs – that no one has ever seen on his donkey, let alone a hairy bunyip that was shaved with blunt canetoads and fairy floss – to create a sweet hairy ball.
“Allready for a game of netball, where a winner eats sheep brains with tomato sauce like nanna used2 make for growler?” Nasty ol nanna – with lambs fry and carp eyes. Along came spidaman and sorted nanna. Took her brush to BB w()lf, where riding h00d laughed her ar5e – then caught a nasty swine flu, which is common – hanging around pigs that can fly to Uranus and back, where he has no mud and sniffed gloo like a dirty gloo sniffer that we all are. Lol – according to some bugger up here ^ - who knows best, is not west.
We’re all gunna take the test. Aahhhhm, sir - lol
To venture west, in your vest of many colours, with a knotted flowery man bag following the alien spiders from mars, on a big leash, walked by astronauts in their jump suits across the desert on a horse with no name – it felt good to be high – to be out- gay and proud and on top of the float with purple sequins and lightning bolts in fluffy tuu tuu and my best evening wear, which consists of nothing but a tartan skirt and sporran and the bagpipes, a Japanese headband, a samuri sword, a cordless phone and a Lithgow .303 – old army issue with iron sights and rusty ammo split the chamber sourced from india – coz it’s cheaper. So more fun than a snickers in ya jocks or a rubber novelty plucked chicken with angel wings.
While wearing pink and sitting in, ‘cause there, the armour was perfect and the stench – oh so fine. But wait.
“What the hell’s that?”
“Just another patrol.”
“Thought it was a lochnest monster emerging from the swamp in bonny Scotland – wearing a kilt with a sporen, playing his bagpipes, while on scotch that he loved with ice only. One after the other, nectar of gods, he sang as he got pi??ed on from the other bloke on vodka and orange – which girls drink for their boyfriends, as guys drink beer n rum, but mainly jacks and c@n@d!@n Club, as it tastes oh so good with fish eggs in a bucket. All mixed together with frozen pilchards and smoked kippers and fresh oysters – in a big stew with dumplings and read to eat around the campfire, with fresh damper.
“That’s the best beer iv tasted to soak up the left over campfire stories – that are beerly true – but still make a good nightly trip all worth while to drop a very large toybota in and flush it down toilet where it belongs, but it clogs like a giant dirty dunny brush with steel bristles covered in …. that landcrabs eat along with sumpoil and busted diffs out of H0lden$.”
“You measn F0rd$?”
“But I didn’t.”
Definitely not Ni$$an$ and l@da sump oil to put into prospective the issues for tissues
tissues for snot
being broken down
for lada drivers
(always had a saying for lada drivers....lol)
(niva mind save up a lada money and buy a real 4wd one day)
u know why they put demisters in the back windows of lada's to keep their hands warm while they are pushing them after they break down .....lol
i hate lada's they are a lada sh!!!!!!!TTT
and their snotboxes
and toy motas