Struth whats a bloke gotta do

[Gary Vansleve]

It all came to a head yesterday. Been fightin a hernia for a while now stickin ma head in the sand so to speak. Got sick an tired of pushing my intestine or whatever it is back in the hole (hernia is in the groin) when the pain comes on. So low an behold a spark started to flicker in what's termed a brain between my ears what could I do to keep the thing from poking out.

I needed something to hold it in when all of a sudden it came to me the missus pantyhose sometime's I just amaze myself. So off I went snuck into the ensuit rummaged through the missus's draws so to speak found a pair and squeezed into them. Feelin mighty pleased with myself thinking this could work when low an behold who should walk in right when I was checkin myself out in the mirror yep you guessed it the missus.

Well you should have heard it an what the bloody hell do you think your doin what are ya some sort of fag what the hell. It kept on goin on an on so just to shut her up I had to fess up an told her the truth (been keepin it from her). Well I thought she was going to get my super statement again (see my post re patrol manuals) but she grabbed my ear and froggmarched me out to the car an off we went to the doc (family friend) with me kickin an screamin but to no avail.

Comes in with me to the doc an proceeds to tell him what she saw the doc has tears in his eyes an rollin arround the floor killin himself with laughter the receptionist comes in to find out what's goin on the missus tell her( she is also family friend) she's killin herself with laughter and goes out an starts blabbin to all an sundry in the waiting room bloody hell what's a bloke gotta do.

Doc tells me the bad news goin to be layed up for quite a while so no bench pressin land cruiser axles for me for a while shit what's a bloke gonna do. To make matters worse I have been floggin myself for the last 6 months fixin up what need fixin arround the place to keep the missus happy so I could start workin on my play toy an old 40 series cruiser without her in my ear. Probably got the bloody hernia from that.What's a bloke gotta do. Drink yeah that could be the go off to the local while Iam recuperating whatta ya reckin.

[growler2058]

Id stop flogging yaself youll go blind and have a hernia hahahhahaa

[Clunk]

Id stop flogging yaself youll go blind and have a hernia hahahhahaa

Sounds like its a bit too late to stop now...............

So how did the tights feel, or were they fish nets, I doubt they would have helped much lol

[BigRAWesty]

Sounds like its a bit too late to stop now...............

So how did the tights feel, or were they fish nets, I doubt they would have helped much lol

Na Fish nets would make shoit all square lol..

What a story. But probably best for ya the missis did catch ya.. Probably not then and there I'll admit but before you fell to bits..

Anyway, enjoy the few weeks piece..

[the ferret]

Well that's the best excuse I've heard fer wearing womens gear, very original lol
cheers, the ferret.

[Gary Vansleve]

Don't tell anyone must admit the missus stilletos started to look good. Booked in for 19 Feb for specialist to check me out, Doc tells me lookin at probably 6 weeks after op before I can even think about doin some heavy work but specialist will let me know when he checks me out.

I think he may be geein me up because the missus an him where talkin for a while when I left the doc's surgery. Bloody hell it could be up to 9 weeks of misery for me will go potty for sure. After seeing the smug look on the missus dial told her I might hook up the van an take off for a while after the op to recuperate out in the sticks. That got her attention she then replies well there will be no shanigans for you for a while with the smug look commin back on her face.

I wonder if I will ever have a win.

[the ferret]

Get the operation over and done with and you won't know yaself, it would only get worse and a bigger repair job.
Cop it on the chin mate.
Anyway, easier to pull pantyhose on without a hernia, even shoes to match, does she have a nice handbag to go with it?
Cheers, the ferret

[TPC]

Sounds like its a bit too late to stop now...............

So how did the tights feel, or were they fish nets, I doubt they would have helped much lol

I am glad you didn't ask for photos.

[threedogs]

I think there are support groups for cross dressers.
or convert the Patrol into Priscilla Queen of the desert, ha ha ha
Only laughing cause you got caught

[Gary Vansleve]

[QUOTE=the ferret;474423]Get the operation over and done with and you won't know yaself, it would only get worse and a bigger repair job.
Cop it on the chin mate.

Yeah mate I know all's sweet just lookin for a bit of sympathy not gettin much at home sob blubber sob ha ha.

[Gary Vansleve]

Photos someone mention photos ?? could see what I could come up with if ya want. Bugger what am I sayin that's it I am swearin off cross dressin for life.:wink:

[threedogs]

Take some pole dancing lesson and scare the begeesus out of her.
Just give me a heads up on any meet p trips you attend lol

[Bush Ranger]

101 uses for nylon stockings. Used by bank robbers and cross dressers since 1939.

[Clunk]

I am glad you didn't ask for photos.

I know I love piccies, just not that sort lol

[Steve4wdin]

I think I saw something about AB and the mardigra. Sounds like a perfect candidate.
I hope you didn't where the stocking to the doc!!!!

[tiny]

Mate i've got an umbilical Hernia and after too many beers it pops out and i have to pull my jeans up and tighten my belt over it!!!!!

Been on waiting list for 4months and have got 8 to go cause private health won't cover it asap cause its pre existing... kaaarrnnts!

[Steve4wdin]

Should put Gary and RLI (Paul) in the same room. They can tell the funny side

[threedogs]

mate just had his hernia removed looked like a thumb poking out of his stomach.lol
Had it for years

Audition for Moulon Rouge

[oncedisturbed]

I had an Ingual Hernia (right side of groin) repared back in 99/2000 via laproscopic surgery and they installed surgical mesh over the damaged area, still feel movement to this day

[Gary Vansleve]

I had an Ingual Hernia (right side of groin) repared back in 99/2000 via laproscopic surgery and they installed surgical mesh over the damaged area, still feel movement to this day

Ha feel like an old war dog comparin wounds had one of them 4 years ago on left side but this one is shit worse. As previously said was floggin myself doing shit arround house. Last thing doin was carport for van was lifting 6m x175 x50 hardwood beams 3 metres up on a rickety old ladder that didn't help much. Fook thinkin gettin too old for this shiat. Think I will go public on ma cross dressin might cheer me up.