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10th August 2010, 01:34 PM
#41
Rural Australian Computer Terminology
A little bit of Aussie
Kulcha.....
LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie hotter
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie
MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the Barbie
DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute
HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies
KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys
WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold
SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season
BYTE: What mozzies do
MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do
CHIP: Bar snack
MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips
MODEM: What you did to the lawns
LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps
SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster
HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart
MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed
MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up
WEB: What spiders make
WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the veranda
SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go
CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go
YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go
UPGRADE: A steep hill
SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch
MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch
USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things
NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net
INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go
NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net
ONLINE: Where you hang the washing
OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough
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10th August 2010 01:34 PM
# ADS
Circuit advertisement
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10th August 2010, 05:12 PM
#42
Originally Posted by
locks
A little bit of Aussie
Kulcha.....
LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie hotter
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie
MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the Barbie
DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute
HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies
KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys
WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold
SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season
BYTE: What mozzies do
MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do
CHIP: Bar snack
MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips
MODEM: What you did to the lawns
LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps
SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster
HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart
MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed
MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up
WEB: What spiders make
WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the veranda
SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go
CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go
YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go
UPGRADE: A steep hill
SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch
MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch
USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things
NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net
INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go
NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net
ONLINE: Where you hang the washing
OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough
I've copied that its a keeper....lolololol
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10th August 2010, 08:50 PM
#43
Expert
2 bananas were lying on the side of the river bank when a turd floats by , B1 says to the turd "hows the water ", turd says " it's great come on in " B2 says to B1
"do you believe that shit "............
theres a simple one for ya plassy
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10th August 2010, 09:18 PM
#44
Simple jokes hey guys, ok. Why did the kid fall off his bike?
Because someone threw a fridge at him! Badoom ching!
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10th August 2010, 09:34 PM
#45
Trying to think of more......
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11th August 2010, 09:18 PM
#46
Broccoli Casserole
A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for Christmas dinner.
This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing under the woman's chair, and said in a rather stern voice, 'Skippy!'.
The woman thought, 'This is great!' and a big smile came across her face.
A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer rrrrrip.
The father again looked at the dog and yelled, 'Skippy!'
Once again the woman smiled and thought 'Yes!' A few minutes later the woman had to let another rip.. This time she didn't even think about it.
She let a fart rip that rivaled a train whistle blowing.
Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, 'Skippy, get away from her, before she shits on you!'
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11th August 2010, 10:07 PM
#47
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL...........Cor I have tears thanks to that one...................lol
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12th August 2010, 07:27 PM
#48
I will get some more soon!
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12th August 2010, 07:58 PM
#49
Bitumen Burner
The Joke Thread......
Paul's been ripped of with his thread counter. AB has set it up so it won't click over to 1,000. hahahahahahahhaha
Winner of 'Best 4 x 4 ' at the 2017 Albany Agricultural Society Inc - Town n Country Ute Muster.
Ex Telstra - 2005, 4.2 TDi ute -with pod and more fruit than a grocery shop.
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12th August 2010, 08:02 PM
#50
Originally Posted by
DX grunt
The Joke Thread......
Paul's been ripped of with his thread counter. AB has set it up so it won't click over to 1,000. hahahahahahahhaha
Hay Rossco did you team up with AB for that one??????????? I know you too are up to something......lol
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