The Joke Thread

[locks]

A little bit of Aussie
Kulcha.....


LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie hotter

LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the Barbie

DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute

HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies

KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys

WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold

SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season

BYTE: What mozzies do

MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do

CHIP: Bar snack

MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips

MODEM: What you did to the lawns

LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps

SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster

HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart

MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed

MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up

WEB: What spiders make

WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the veranda

SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go

CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go

YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go

UPGRADE: A steep hill

SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch

MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch

USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things

NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net

INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go

NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net

ONLINE: Where you hang the washing

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough

[patch697]

A little bit of Aussie
Kulcha.....


LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie hotter

LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the Barbie

DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute

HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies

KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys

WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold

SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season

BYTE: What mozzies do

MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do

CHIP: Bar snack

MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips

MODEM: What you did to the lawns

LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps

SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster

HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart

MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed

MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up

WEB: What spiders make

WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the veranda

SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go

CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go

YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go

UPGRADE: A steep hill

SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch

MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch

USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things

NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net

INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go

NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net

ONLINE: Where you hang the washing

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough

I've copied that its a keeper....lolololol

[Pete's GU3]

2 bananas were lying on the side of the river bank when a turd floats by , B1 says to the turd "hows the water ", turd says " it's great come on in " B2 says to B1
"do you believe that shit "............

theres a simple one for ya plassy

[locks]

Simple jokes hey guys, ok. Why did the kid fall off his bike?

Because someone threw a fridge at him! Badoom ching!

[CoR]

Trying to think of more......

[CoR]

Broccoli Casserole
A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for Christmas dinner.
This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing under the woman's chair, and said in a rather stern voice, 'Skippy!'.
The woman thought, 'This is great!' and a big smile came across her face.
A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer rrrrrip.
The father again looked at the dog and yelled, 'Skippy!'
Once again the woman smiled and thought 'Yes!' A few minutes later the woman had to let another rip.. This time she didn't even think about it.
She let a fart rip that rivaled a train whistle blowing.
Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, 'Skippy, get away from her, before she shits on you!'

[patch697]

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL...........Cor I have tears thanks to that one...................lol

[CoR]

I will get some more soon!

[DX grunt]

The Joke Thread......


Paul's been ripped of with his thread counter. AB has set it up so it won't click over to 1,000. hahahahahahahhaha

[patch697]

The Joke Thread......


Paul's been ripped of with his thread counter. AB has set it up so it won't click over to 1,000. hahahahahahahhaha

Hay Rossco did you team up with AB for that one??????????? I know you too are up to something......lol