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FNQGU
10th October 2018, 07:20 PM
Guys, I've got a bit of a request... I need some sounding boards so to speak, for a proposed marketing blurb to try and get the word out about our Expedition Boxes and want to know what you all think. The verbage is a bit risque (if that is how you spell that word... meaning possibly sexist... and topped off with references to anatomy), but my marketing mate, who I went to college with, who has no special skills in anything really, and probably shouldn't be trusted with anything to do with my business, thinks it is a great idea. Actually, I lie, he is a professional marketer...

Anyway, there is a series of box features that we want to get highlighted to the general public in short word flogs. Below is an example - I would love to know if you think this going overboard or a bad idea.

1.
Have you ever grown tired of having to undo all your ratchet straps or ropes, to stuff your gear inside a box strapped on your roof rack? You know, when you are tired from that long drive and trying not to get covered in the road dust that's all over everything?

Well, we at Open Sky Touring had the same problems and decided we just wanted something better. So, what did we do? We built our own!! Enter the Expedition Box! It has dedicated tie-down points on the corners, so you donít have to undo anything other than the latches. These tie-down points will work with ratchet straps, ropes up to 12mm, bungie cords and even steel turn-buckles and make the job that much faster. Want to tie down your box and stick your gear in it? Well try a good Aussie Box - at just the right price!

or...
2.
Have you ever been frustrated by the struggle to clean out one of those heavy roto-moulded boxes after a trip? You know, the ones where the weeks of dirt and dust and crud gets caught beneath the lip of the box and you have to sponge it out to get it clean again?

Our Expedition Boxes are super smooth inside with a flat floor for easy stacking of your gear and cleaning out at the end of some hard use. We think it is the best thing since sliced bread and so do many others. Everyone loves a smooth box that is easy to clean!

etc. etc. There are so many Box puns it is hard to keep them even semi-clean!

Thoughts?

Cuppa
10th October 2018, 07:38 PM
I read your opening paragraph, cringed a bit & thought "Oh Gawd, wotseegonnadonow?"

Then I read 1 & 2 & wondered why I'd doubted you.

The 'risque-ness' is mild enough for most to let it pass without noticing, & those that do will likely think it unintended, & that they had thought it themselves. Ha ha.

Despite that, one has to consider that my opinion is male, & that potential female buyers may have a different view.

Just ran it past MrsTea. She reckons most women wouldn't even notice the puns, (she didn't) but said men would 'cos it's something on mens's minds all the time!

TimE
10th October 2018, 07:44 PM
............. at least you didn't talk about "sticking your junk into a new box" ................

Either one of your choices are inoffensive to me.

MB
10th October 2018, 07:44 PM
Only my opinion Ben mate and I am certainly not in charge of marketing in our game.
Just reckon you’ve worked so hard to date in developing a quality product, wouldn’t cheapen it for quids if it were me.
Technical specs, guarantees, customer tough tested references you’ll no doubt have soon Aussie Made Certified Mate!
Commercial, Industrial & Military Services they could become for you we hope too!



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rusty_nail
10th October 2018, 09:13 PM
Spoke to the wife who is a professional marketer, the thinks the first one is ok but the second probably too much.

Also she had asked who your target audience is? Do you think these type of ads will connect with them?

Maybe I'm wrong but both of your blurbs sound a little like an infomercial.

I think mark is spot on, no need to cheapen your product with gags mate.

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FNQGU
10th October 2018, 09:14 PM
So...

You don't think we should re-brand and call ourselves "The Great Aussie Box" Ready for your gear? Loves to be tied down? Great tight seal and locked off from other buggers trying to get in?

mudnut
10th October 2018, 09:24 PM
If you're gonna do puns, go the whole hog. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUfC_ZC44dg

Plasnart
10th October 2018, 09:26 PM
MB absolutely spot on for me. Couldn't say it better. Don't risk cheapening perceptions of your product by using borderline bawdiness. Just my opinion.

Cremulator
10th October 2018, 09:58 PM
This is a high quality product, that is well designed and thought out, and you should market it to people in the same way.

Drum home the name of the product in these blurbs too.

Aim at the mass market with broader terminology that will connect with a broader audience.
Tell people how you are solving a problem that they have.

What about something like this?

1.

Have you ever had to undo ropes or ratchet straps to get into a storage box you've firmly secured?
The Expedition Box solves that problem with dedicated tie-down points on each corner, so you don’t have to undo anything, other than the latches, to effortlessly flip open the lid.

2.

Have you ever been frustrated by the struggle to clean out a storage box?
The Expedition Box has super smooth insides with a flat floor for easy cleaning and loading of your gear. The lid is also easily removable for cleaning, or to stack empty boxes together for efficient storage.


BTW, I ordered one on Monday. I can wait to test it out [emoji106]

Ash

Cuppa
10th October 2018, 10:12 PM
In light of other comments, I have reconsidered mine.

I think others are right. Don't take unnecessary risks.

the evil twin
10th October 2018, 10:23 PM
So...

You don't think we should re-brand and call ourselves "The Great Aussie Box" Ready for your gear? Loves to be tied down? Great tight seal and locked off from other buggers trying to get in?

Nailed it!!!

Seriously tho if the word "box" is causing the double entendre issues then maybe use "Case" or somesuch instead (as a descriptor) and only refer to it as the Expedition Box as a name IE...

Tired of constantly undoing ropes or ratchet straps to get into a storage case you've firmly secured for that forgotten item?
The dust and waterproof Expedition Box solves that problem with dedicated tie-down points on each corner so you simply flip the lockable latches and open the lid.


Frustrated by the struggle to clean out every nook and cranny after that epic trip?
The Expedition Box has a super smooth inside for effortless cleaning and the lid is easily removed to stack empty boxes for efficient storage.

Not perfect but any more and I'll have to charge consultancy fees

jack
10th October 2018, 10:27 PM
I'm with Mark (MB) on this one, sell it on it's merits.

MB
10th October 2018, 10:50 PM
Tis ‘Fully Sic’ bro ?
Store all our Vodka Cruisers?



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FNQGU
11th October 2018, 07:52 AM
Righto, consenus wins. I'll tell our marketing bloke to piss off and stick with the plan. Could have been fun though...

the evil twin
11th October 2018, 11:15 AM
Righto, consenus wins. I'll tell our marketing bloke to piss off and stick with the plan. Could have been fun though...

Consensus my bum... the majority are only right a majority not always... dare to be different I say!!!

Camera close up of open Expedition Box fills screen
Voice over "Expedition Box... the perfect dustproof, waterproof, secure place for your clothes when having that skinny dip in pristine wilderness"
Clothing tumbles into Box and camera zooms back to show at least 6 (it is a 55 litre remember) extremely hot models (M & F no misogyny here) running down beach into water.

I missed my calling eh...

FNQGU
11th October 2018, 12:02 PM
You're a natural...

mudnut
11th October 2018, 01:01 PM
Boring but here goes: A few heavily-laden boxes tied to the draw bar of a camper, getting absolutely hammered, immersion and all.

If you care about what's on the the inside.... Expedition Box, the perfect solution.

Could also have another vehicle trailing with an ordinary box that gets filled with red dust and a bit of mud.

AB
11th October 2018, 05:09 PM
Agree with all of the above, don't cheap it out with slap stick humour.

Personally I would go the hard tough quality line with key features, benefits, quality, specs and music like this...

Get someone good at animation (if you end up doing video) and have the box being used or rotating 360 and the shot freezes at different points with annotations, etc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIG04yQJQ2k&index=46&list=UU9QS98w1CVHEBP03pU7X3mA


(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIG04yQJQ2k&index=46&list=UU9QS98w1CVHEBP03pU7X3mA)

AB
11th October 2018, 05:18 PM
Kind of like some of the features in this video with tough background music.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIgBszDFwDo